PSA

Jun. 29th, 2025 01:54 pm[personal profile] rydra_wong
rydra_wong: Lee Miller photo showing two women wearing metal fire masks in England during WWII. (Default)
Disco Elysium is currently 90% off in the Steam summer sale, making it a mere £3.49.

Play Disco Elysium, everybody. Yes, even if you don't play video games.

If you understand the principle of a Choose Your Own Adventure book, have a vague sense that "stats" and "levelling up" are things, and can grasp "click to go to a place/interact with an object," you are sufficiently equipped.
rachelmanija: (Books: old)
84 Charing Cross Road, by Helene Hanff




A sweet epistolatory memoir consisting of the letters written by a woman in New York City with extremely specific tastes (mostly classic nonfiction) and the English bookseller whose books she buys. Their correspondence continues over 20 years, from the 1940s to the 1960s. It's an enjoyable read but I think it became a ginormous bestseller largely because it hit some kind of cultural zeitgeist when it came out.


I Survived the Great Molasses Flood, by Lauren Tarshis




The graphic novel version! I read this after DNFing the supposedly definitive book on the event, Dark Flood, due to the author making all sorts of unsourced claims while bragging about all the research he did. The point at which I returned the book to Ingram with extreme prejudice was when he claimed that no one had ever written about the flood before him except for children's books where it was depicted as a delightful fairyland where children danced around snacking on candy. WHAT CHILDREN'S BOOKS ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?

The heroine of I Survived the Great Molasses Flood is an immigrant from Italy whose family was decimated in a flood over there. A water flood. It's got a nice storyline about the immigrant experience. The molasses flood is not depicted as a delightful fairyland because I suspect no one has ever done that. It also provides the intriguing context that the molasses was not used for sweetening food, but was going to be converted into sugar alcohol to be used, among other things, for making bombs!

My favorite horrifying detail was that when the giant molasses vat started expanding, screws popped out so fast that they acted as shrapnel. I also enjoyed the SPLOOSH! SPLAT! GRRRRMMMMM! sound effects.


The 7 1/2 Deaths of Evelyn Hardcastle, by Stuart Turton




A very unusual murder mystery/historical/fantasy/??? about a guy who wakes up with amnesia in someone else's body. He quickly learns that he is being body-switched every time he falls asleep, into the bodies of assorted people present at a party where Evelyn Hardcastle was murdered. He needs to solve the mystery, or else.

This premise gets even more complicated from then on; it's not just a mystery who killed Evelyn Hardcastle, but why he's being bodyswapped, and who other mysterious people are. It's technically adept and entertaining. Everything does have an explanation, and a fairly interesting and weird one - which makes sense, as it's a weird book.
conuly: (Default)
Dear Annie: I have always felt like the odd one out in my family. I love them deeply, but I cannot ignore the quiet, persistent feeling that I do not quite belong. My two younger brothers, "Tom" and "Michael," are close with each other and with our parents, especially our mom. They talk every day, go on trips together and always seem to be in sync.

I, on the other hand, have always felt different. I was more sensitive, more artistic and more emotional growing up. While they were into sports and fixing things with Dad, I was reading, journaling or off by myself. I was teased for being "too dramatic" or "too much," and I learned early on to keep my feelings to myself.

Now that we are adults, not much has changed. Family group chats often go on without me. I find out about birthdays or get-togethers after the fact. When I try to bring it up gently, I get told I'm imagining things or taking things too personally. My mom says she loves me just as much, but I still feel like I'm standing on the outside looking in.

I want to be part of the family, not just in name but in heart. I want to feel seen, heard and valued -- not like the extra piece that doesn't quite fit. Is there anything I can do to shift this dynamic, or is it time to accept that things may never change? -- Outside in My Family


Annie's advice is better than I would've hoped for )
conuly: (Default)
1. DEAR ABBY: My son and daughter-in-law had their first child three months ago. This was the first grandchild on both sides. Her mother stayed with her for two weeks after the cesarean birth. I have no issues with that.

My issue is, my son told me I needed to leave when they and the baby came home from the hospital. Mind you, I live 6 1/2 hours away. I fought him to get at least three days when they got home. Then he said I needed to leave, but he never told his father-in-law to leave. Also, on the days I did stay, they asked me to get a motel while her parents stayed with them. I only got to go over during the day.

When I told my son my feelings were hurt, he said I was being a drama queen. I did respect everything they asked. I just want to know if I was wrong for sharing my feelings or should I have remained quiet. It has caused friction between us now. -- SECOND-CLASS IN TENNESSEE


Read more... )

*********


2. DEAR ABBY: My 19-year-old son, who is on the spectrum but high-functioning, has left home. He's legally an adult but wouldn't allow me to teach him normal survival skills, such as balancing a checkbook, paying with a debit card, etc. He knows very little about the world; he learns from his online friends.

It has been four months, and he has now changed his phone number and won't call, email or text. He moved across the country to live with an online friend. I'm very concerned about him. What should I do? I don't email him often, but when I do, I just tell him I love him, and I never say anything negative. -- LOST IN CALIFORNIA


Read more... )

(no subject)

Jun. 28th, 2025 03:28 am[personal profile] conuly posting in [community profile] agonyaunt
conuly: (Default)
Dear Care and Feeding,

I just learned my son has been doing something truly vile.

The warmer weather has been back in our area for a little over a month now. Many of our friends and relatives have swimming pools (we do, too). Last weekend, we were at my sister’s place and had been in the pool for a good three hours when it came time to leave. Before we went home, I asked my 7-year-old son, “Noah” if he needed to use the restroom, and he said, “No.”

On the drive back home, I joked that Noah must have a bladder of steel since he’d had no fewer than three iced teas while he was in the pool! Noah replied that no, he just urinated when he was in the pool, so he didn’t have to get out and use the bathroom. I was horrified and asked if this was something he had done before. He said, “All the time.”

I laid down the law with him. I made clear that this was never to happen again. I explained how harmful and disrespectful it was to everyone in the water around him and that it throws the pool chemicals out of balance. Noah agreed not to do it again, but I’m not sure I completely trust him. I got the sense he didn’t seem to think he did anything wrong. What can I do to make sure he keeps his word?

—Parent of a Pool Pisser


Read more... )
reeby10: an old school error pop up that says 'canon error' at the top and 'apply fanfic? ok' (fanfic)
Fandom: Midsommar
Characters: Dani Ardor, Hanna, Siv
Rating: T
Length: 4,212
Creator Links: [archiveofourown.org profile] Selkit
Theme: female relationships

Summary: In her dreams, dark smudges crowd the edges of the world. One looms larger than the rest, twisting into impossible shapes, morphing into a figure with many faces, all of them howling with rage.

When she jolts awake, the dream-figure lingers. She tries to ignore it. She’s no stranger to nightmares. Her whole life has been one ever since her family’s deaths.

But things are different now. This is a new life. A new family.

Right?

Reccer's Notes: I love seeing what happens with Dani after the events of Midsommar, and this is such a good look at the continued ritual of being the May Queen! I am a known ho for ritual, but especially building off of the existing worldbuilding in such a believable way. I really enjoyed seeing more of Dani interacting with the other women of the Hårga as she learns to be part of her new family and culture. Plus the parts with Maja’s (and Christian’s) daughter were just perfect.

Fanwork Links: on AO3

Original Work: Always with you by Anonymous

Jun. 28th, 2025 02:06 pm[personal profile] mific posting in [community profile] fancake
mific: (Art brushes pencils)
Fandom: original work
Characters/Pairings: powerful mage/warrior bonded to her
Rating: G
Length: n/a
Creator Links: creators have been revealed but the artist chose to make the work anon.
Themes: Female relationships, Femslash, Female characters, Characters of color, Magic

Summary: none provided

Reccer's Notes: Another gorgeous work from the recent Everything is Femslash exchange. It's in a fantasy setting, featuring a mage and her warrior. I love the warm earthy colours, and how, the mage being a little shorter, their faces and bodies fit together perfectly, and the way they're linked by the swirl of the magical bond. Beautiful. (Note that the post is locked to AO3.)

Fanwork Links: Always with you

self-censorship

Jun. 27th, 2025 02:02 pm[personal profile] rivkat
rivkat: Rivka as Wonder Woman (Default)

no good, very bad thing: for the first time ever, I carefully concealed my Star of David scrunchie to do an interview in case it became a distraction. I try hard not to self-censor, but ...


DCU: Office Meeting by Unpretty

Jun. 27th, 2025 09:06 am[personal profile] sinesofinsanity posting in [community profile] fancake
sinesofinsanity: For squeeing (Batman Squee)
Fandom: DC Comics
Pairings/Characters: Pamela Isely/Harleen Quinzel, Bruce Wayne
Rating: Teen 
Length: 1,882 words
Creator Links: Unpretty on AO3
Theme: Female relationships, Canon lgbtq+ characters, humour, superpowers

Summary:
Bruce Wayne deals with supervillains almost as much as Batman does.

Reccer's Notes:
Harley Quinn and Poison Ivy break into Bruce Wayne's office to stop Wayne Enterprises from doing evil corporate stuff. Or kill him. Bruce plays dumb. It's glorious. 
I love Harley and Ivy's relationship in this. They're so true in how they love and support each other but are definitely super-villains who will definitely kill and/or main whoever gets in their way. Also Bruce's line about how Pamela probably wants to kill him because Harley finds him hot :D Bruce being smart by playing dumb is one of my favourite things. 

Fanwork Links: Office Meeting
Also has a podfic
 

Things

Jun. 27th, 2025 09:42 pm[personal profile] vass
vass: Small turtle with green leaf in its mouth (Default)
Books
Still reading A Power Unbound.

Comics
Caught up on Order of the Stick (I was at about #1319, and the most recent one was #1328.) Welp, that was a thing that happened.

Things are also Happening in Dumbing of Age. I am looking at the title text in June 24's strip and glowering distrustfully at Willis after what happened last big finale.

Games
Playing a lot of Simon Tatham's Puzzle Games on my phone.
Slay the Spire: have now unlocked Ascension 4 on all four characters. Surprisingly (to me?) the hardest run on Ascension 3 was with the Defect.

Links


Cats
Ash is down an incisor and a canine as of last Tuesday. He was good and brave at the vet and, after he got home, patient with Dorian's mistaking him for a stranger because he smelled Wrong.

Phenology
No new kangaroo visits. It's been very cold out.

Star Trek Reboot: Relaxing by storietellers

Jun. 27th, 2025 12:22 am[personal profile] mific posting in [community profile] fancake
mific: (spock-dog)
Fandom: Star Trek: Reboot
Characters/Pairings: James Kirk/Leonard 'Bones' McCoy
Rating: G
Length: n/a
Creator Links: storietellers on AO3
Themes: Female relationships, Domestic, Femslash

Summary: "Having fun, Bones?"
"Just working out the tension. You really keep it all in your wrists. Keep reading, darlin'. I wanna know what happens next."

Reccer's Notes:
The 'Everything is Femslash' exchange has just revealed creators, and this is a gorgeous artwork of Rule 63 (always a girl) Kirk and McCoy chilling out. The lighting is warm and their likenesses are really well done. It's relaxing just to look at.

Fanwork Links: Relaxing
rydra_wong: Lee Miller photo showing two women wearing metal fire masks in England during WWII. (Default)
https://www.thepinknews.com/2025/06/25/trans-westminster-lobby-ehrc/

The organizers are estimating circa 900 people showed up, putting it on a par with the biggest LGBTQ+ lobbies ever (against Section 28).

Outstanding work from the Trans+ Solidarity Alliance, who also organized the legal briefing for MPs in May:

https://www.attitude.co.uk/news/trans-legal-experts-warn-supreme-court-ruling-could-be-breaching-human-rights-in-parliamentary-briefing-483801/

You can support them and get the "Maybe I'm trans?" badges or just support them without badges:

https://www.crowdfunder.co.uk/p/maybe-im-trans
https://www.crowdfunder.co.uk/p/solidarity-projects-campaigns-fund

(no subject)

Jun. 24th, 2025 09:40 am[personal profile] conuly posting in [community profile] agonyaunt
conuly: (Default)
Dear Carolyn: Self-admitted crabby old broad here. My newish next-door neighbors are 24/7 noise. While the apartment is a studio, I can hear at least two adults and two children — one infant, one toddler.

The kids are up at all hours — either screaming in delight and running around or wailing in misery. The adults yell all the time. Movies, TV and music all play at incredible volume, and now a dog was added to the mix. It howls and cries whenever they leave it alone.

I don’t want to be That Person, but I’m tired of asking them, at 1 a.m., to turn down the TV, music, etc. Do I report them to the condo board? They are tenants. I’m hesitant, as I worry this studio may be the only space they can afford, but also frustrated by the noise.

— Crabby Old Broad


Read more... )

(no subject)

Jun. 24th, 2025 09:15 am[personal profile] conuly posting in [community profile] agonyaunt
conuly: (Default)
Dear Care and Feeding,
My husband and I have a 7-year-old daughter, “Jade,” who my mother-in-law, “Pam,” is in the habit of buying clothes for without consulting us. These are always girly-girl things—mostly dresses, lots of pink—and Jade is absolutely not a girly-girl. She refuses to wear them, and we end up donating them.

The trouble is that Pam takes offense that she never sees Jade wearing “what I worked so hard to pick out” and has even gone so far as to guilt her: “Don’t you like what Nanna gave you?” I have tried explaining to my MIL that while we appreciate her generosity, Jade simply isn’t into those types of things, but she refuses to accept it and thinks that our daughter will come to like them “once she matures.” My husband says we should just carry on as we have and let her waste her money if she wants. Pam has four boys, so he thinks that’s where this is coming from (Jade is her only granddaughter so far). Is that the right approach?

—Dress Distress


Read more... )

Gimme a quilt!

Jun. 23rd, 2025 12:45 pm[personal profile] ysobel posting in [community profile] agonyaunt
ysobel: (Default)
Dear Eric: My sister-in-law made quilts for two of her nieces. They unwrapped them to oohs, aahs and applause on Christmas Eve at my house. My daughter did not receive a gift. I sent a polite email to sister-in-law explaining that my daughter was disappointed. I received a snail mail reply that included a gift certificate and a note. Sister-in-law wrote that I was a bully and stated that she would never set foot in my house again. She hasn’t for several years. What should I do?

— Stitchy Situation


Situation: Your sister-in-law’s reaction was a bit extreme, all things considered (or at least all things detailed in your letter). This suggests to me that maybe there’s something else under it for her, whether it’s other issues she has with your relationship or a sensitivity around the particular gift. Or maybe her feelings were hurt by your email, even though it was polite.

The best way to sort it all out is by asking. It’s been years and she hasn’t come back, so I’m curious what your relationship is like outside of visits. Has this escalated to grudge territory? Does she speak to you at all? If she doesn’t, you may have to make a bigger gesture in order to reset things. Telling her, “I don’t like what happened between us” and “I’m sorry for my part” could help lay a foundation for reconciliation.

Try, if you can, not to let the conversation get too caught up in what happened years ago, though. The gift card, the email, et cetera. All the details can become places where you both get stuck relitigating and rehashing. Instead, focus on the objective of the conversation — you want to re-establish contact. It will also help to have a concrete goal, as well as an emotional one. Perhaps something like extending an invitation for her to come for lunch.

If she’s not receptive to a phone call or face-to-face conversation, an email or letter will work, but a spoken conversation is vastly more effective.
full_metal_ox: Escher’s “Print Gallery” as a rotating TV image. (TV)
Fandom: Neuromancer | Sprawl Trilogy - William Gibson
Pairings/Characters: Gen; Sally Shears | Molly Millions & Yanaka Kumiko
Rating: General Audiences
Length: 1,225
Content Notes: No Archive Warnings Apply (but a character’s dark backstory is hinted at.)
Creator Tags: Cyberpunk, razor girl, Friendship, Mentors, Mentor & Protégé, Yakuza, Missing Scene, Female Friendship, Backstory, Fanon
Creator Links: (AO3) [archiveofourown.org profile] LizzyChrome; (BlueSky): [bsky.social profile] lizzychrome; (DeviantArt) [deviantart.com profile] lizzychrome; (Facebook) [facebook.com profile] LizzyChrome; (Instagram) [instagram.com profile] lizzy_chrome
Theme: Female Relationships, Backstory, Book Fandoms, Female Friendship, Non-Sexual Intimacy, Older Characters, Worldbuilding

Summary: How do Molly's claws and lenses actually work? Kumiko pries. (Missing scene from "Mona Lisa Overdrive.")

Author’s Notes: If you havne't read MLO yet, I won't spoil anything. I'll just set the scene, without giving anyway any important story elements: Molly is now middle-aged, goes by "Sally Shears," and is working as a body guard for a Japanese girl named Kumiko.

I do not own "Mona Lisa Overdrive."

This oldie was written probably over ten years ago. I originally posted it to Fanfiction.net, then took it down, feeling it was pointless. But in light of the new "Neuromancer" show coming out, I want to preserve this little ficlet, to see how my fanon explanation for how Molly's claws work compares to what (if anything) the show gives us regarding that explanation. After a quick re-read, I decided that no edit was needed. What you see here is what I originally posted ten or eleven years ago.


Reccer's Notes: This vignette expands upon an exchange in Mona Lisa Overdrive between aging cyborg mercenary Sally Shears (AKA Molly Millions, Cat Mother, Steppin’ Razor, Rose Kolodny, and Misty Steele—this lady’s got more names than a Wuxia hero) and her charge Yanaka Kumiko; Sally confides measured bits of her backstory to the crushstruck Kumiko, including stripping to bare a torso-long scar (from a near-fatal cagefighting injury, kept “to remind her of being stupid.”)

It’s a precious moment of trust, an elusive commodity in both women’s lives; LizzyChrome elaborates upon this to let Sally hold forth on how her prosthetics work—a question that Gibson chose to bury under Rule of Cool, and that’s challenged two generations’ worth of illustrators and cosplayers.

With the upcoming Neuromancer series on Apple+TV, Molly finally leaves the roster of visually iconic SFF characters not yet defined in the popular imagination by a screen adaptation (1). The Molly in my head admittedly didn’t resemble Briana Middleton, but I look forward to seeing her interpretation of the role (as well as how faithful to the spirit of the book the script gets to be, now that Hollywood has gotten their hands on

(A) a Beloved Property™,

(B) whose cyberpunk dystopia is feeling uncomfortably real in a number of respects—thanks in no small part to megacorporations like Apple.)


(1) Gully Foyle from The Stars My Destination and Elric of Melniboné also come to mind.


Fanwork Links: Shears, by [archiveofourown.org profile] LizzyChrome.

Nonfiction

Jun. 23rd, 2025 01:08 pm[personal profile] rivkat
rivkat: Rivka as Wonder Woman (Default)
Rana Mitter, Forgotten Ally: China’s World War II, 1937–1945: China fought imperial/Axis Japan, mostly alone (though far from unified), for a long time. A useful reminder that the US saw things through its own lens and that its positive and negative beliefs about Chiang Kai-Shek, in particular, were based on American perspectives distant from actual events.

Gregg Mitman, Empire of Rubber: Firestone’s Scramble for Land and Power in Liberia: Interesting story of imperialist ambition and forced labor in a place marked by previous American intervention; a little too focused on reminding the reader that the author knows that the views he’s explaining/quoting are super racist, but still informative.

Alexandra Edwards, Before Fanfiction: Recovering the Literary History of American Media Fandom: fun read )

Stefanos Geroulanos, The Invention of Prehistory: Empire, Violence, and Our Obsession with Human Origins: Wide-ranging argument that claims about prehistory are always distorted and distorting mirrors of the present, shaped by current obsessions. (Obligatory Beforeigners prompt: that show does a great job of sending up our expectations about people from the past.) This includes considering some groups more “primitive” than others, and seeing migrants as a “flood” of undifferentiated humanity. One really interesting example: Depictions of Neandertals used to show them as both brown and expressionless; then they got expressions at the same time they got whiteness, and their disappearance became warnings about white genocide from another set of African invaders.

J.C. Sharman, Empires of the Weak: The Real Story of European Expansion and the Creation of the New World: Challenges the common narratives of European military superiority in the early modern world (as opposed to by the 19th century, where there really was an advantage)—guns weren’t very good and the Europeans didn’t bring very many to their fights outside of Europe. Likewise, the supposed advantages of military drill were largely not present in the Europeans who did go outside Europe, often as privately funded ventures. Europeans dominated the seas, but Asian and African empires were powerful on land and basically didn’t care very much; Europeans often retreated or relied on allies who exploited them right back. An interesting read. More generally, argues that it’s often hard-to-impossible for leaders to figure out “what worked” in the context of state action; many states that lose wars and are otherwise dysfunctional nevertheless survive a really long time (see, e.g., the current US), while “good” choices are no guarantee of success. In Africa, many people believed in “bulletproofing” spells through the 20th century; when such spells failed, it was because (they said) of failures by the user, like inchastity, or the stronger magic of opponents. And our own beliefs about the sources of success are just as motivated.

Emily Tamkin, Bad Jews: A History of American Jewish Politics and Identities: There are a lot of ways to be an American Jew. That’s really the book.

Roland Barthes, Mythologies (tr. Annette Lavers & Richard Howard): A bunch of close readings of various French cultural objects, from wrestling to a controversy over whether a young girl really wrote a book of poetry. Now the method is commonplace, but Barthes was a major reason why.

Robert Gerwarth, November 1918: The German Revolution: Mostly we think about how the Weimar Republic ended, but this book is about how it began and why leftists/democratic Germans thought there was some hope. Also a nice reminder that thinking about Germans as “rule-followers” is not all that helpful in explaining large historical events, since they did overthrow their governments and also engaged in plenty of extralegal violence.

Mason B. Williams, City of Ambition: FDR, La Guardia, and the Making of Modern New York: Mostly about La Guardia, whose progressive commitments made him a Republican in the Tammany Hall era, and who allied with FDR to promote progressivism around the country. He led a NYC that generated a huge percentage of the country’s wealth but also had a solid middle class, and during the Great Depression used government funds to do big things (and small ones) in a way we haven’t really seen since.

Charan Ranganath, Why We Remember: Unlocking Memory's Power to Hold on to What Matters: Accessible overview of what we know about memory, including the power of place, chunking information, and music and other mnemonics. Also, testing yourself is better than just rereading information—learning through mistakes is a more durable way of learning.

Cynthia Enloe, Twelve Feminist Lessons of War: War does things specifically to women, including the added unpaid labor to keep the home fires burning, while “even patriotic men won’t fight for nothing.” Women farmers who lack formal title to land are especially vulnerable. Women are often told that their concerns need to wait to defeat the bad guys—for example, Algerian women insurgents “internalized three mutually reinforcing gendered beliefs handed down by the male leaders: first, the solidarity that was necessary to defeat the French required unbroken discipline; second, protesting any intra-movement gender unfairness only bolstered the colonial oppressors and thus was a betrayal of the liberationist cause; third, women who willingly fulfilled their feminized assigned wartime gendered roles were laying the foundation for a post-colonial nation that would be authentically Algerian.” And, surprise, things didn’t get better in the post-colonial nation. Quoting Marie-Aimée Hélie-Lucas: “Defending women’s rights ‘now’ – this now being any historical moment – is always a betrayal of the people, of the revolution, of Islam, of national identity, of cultural roots . . .”

Ned Blackhawk, The Rediscovery of America: American history retold from a Native perspective, where interactions with/fears of Indians led to many of the most consequential decisions, and Native lands were used to solve (and create) conflicts among white settlers.

Sophie Gilbert, Girl on Girl : How Pop Culture Turned a Generation of Women Against Themselves: Read more... )

Ta-Nehisi Coates, The Message: Short but not very worthwhile book about Coates navel-gazing and then traveling to Israel and seeing that Palestinians are subject to apartheid.

Thomas Hager, Electric City: The Lost History of Ford and Edison’s American Utopia: While he was being a Nazi, Ford was also trying to take over Muscle Shoals for a dam that would make electricity for another huge factory/town. This is the story of how he failed because a Senator didn’t want to privatize this public resource.

Asheesh Kapur Siddique, The Archive of Empire: Knowledge, Conquest, and the Making of the Early Modern British World: What is the role of records in imperialism? Under what circumstances do imperialists rely on records that purport to be about the colonized people, versus not needing to do so? Often their choices were based on inter-imperialist conflicts—sometimes the East India Company benefited from saying it was relying on Indian laws, and sometimes London wanted different things.

Thomas C. Schelling The Strategy of Conflict: Sometimes when you read a classic, it doesn’t offer much because its insights have been the building blocks for what came after. So too here—if you know any game theory, then very little here will be new (and there’s a lot of math) but that doesn’t mean it wasn’t vital. Also notable: we’ve come around again to deterring (or not) the Russians.

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